A few years ago my husband and I sat down at a table in our Sunday school class and introduced ourselves to two young sisters, Callie and Phoebe Cryar. We asked one another the usual questions and discovered they were in a band called The Vespers. Well, in Nashville just about everyone is in a band, so to be honest we didn't think too much about it until we popped their CD in on our way home from church that afternoon. We were instantly blown away, and have been ever since--not just by their musical giftedness (which is truly mind-blowing), but also by their service to the church and love for Christ.
In 2013 Callie and Phoebe were both married, a week apart, here in Nashville. I thought it would be fun to feature both of their weddings on the blog for a couple of reasons. First, they were lovely and meaningful events. But more importantly, I think they both exhibited a mission to focus on the purpose and meaning of marriage, dwelling more on the larger elements, and less on the details.
Today I'm honored to feature Callie and Reed's wedding, held at the gorgeous Trinity View Farm in Franklin, TN. Callie was a stunning bride, and the wedding was captured beautifully by photographer Madeline Lewis. Thank you, Callie, for thoughtfully answering these questions!
How did it all begin?
Reed and I met through playing music. I was invited to one of his shows and a week later we were both invited to play at the same Christmas show. He befriended my band and we started hanging out occasionally.
Six months later we began dating, and six months after that he proposed. It was on Christmas Day, we were spending a few days visiting his parents and that evening after they had gone to bed we sat together on the couch by the fireplace. He had not given me a present all day and he had hid a box with a ring in it under the Christmas tree. He proposed right there in his parents living room.
We wanted to get married as soon as possible but with our touring schedules the soonest we both had a Saturday off with time for a honeymoon was at the end of April. We got married four months after he proposed.
If you could choose one word to describe your wedding day, what would it be and why?
Unbelievable. Because it almost didn't seem real. I kept thinking to myself "I can't believe I'm finally here!"
What was your favorite part of your wedding day?
The very end of the day, falling asleep beside my husband for the first time.
What were some of the challenges you faced in planning your wedding?
Budget was a challenge at first because we didn't have much money and I wanted to have a pretty wedding. But the more planning I did, the less and less I began to care about the little things. I knew at the end of it all we would be married, no matter what my wedding LOOKED like. I think the challenge lots of brides face is caring so much what other people think. We don't want people to think our wedding is tacky or cheap. Sometimes our wedding day just turns into a big way to show off to all our friends how happy and gorgeous and tasteful we are.
What did you want your wedding to mean and represent? How did you present that meaning?
Thinking back I'd say there were a couple of specific things we wanted for our wedding day. We wanted the gospel to be presented, and for the parallel to be drawn that our marriage is only sustainable through the unconditional love we must have for each other that is first given to us and taught to us through Christ.
However this did not necessarily mean our wedding had to be somber. That didn't fit our personalities and it was certainly not what ended up being the spirit of the day. We wanted our wedding to be fun. It is a celebration after all!
When we discussed our ceremony with our pastor during our premarital counseling we explained this and he completely agreed. We knew that what he would say before and during our vows would set the tone.
What advice would you give Christian couples as they plan their weddings?
Weddings can be a way to put up a front of perfection and beauty to make all our friends and family think well of us. The pictures highlight your best moments, everything is decorated, the bride and groom always look their best. I think many of us want people to leave our wedding and say, "That was the most beautiful/fun/best wedding I've been to." Just remember that it's not about that. It is more important for people to leave your wedding thinking of the things of Christ, perhaps reflecting on their own marriage and the commitment they made years ago. Your wedding day is a chance to bring encouragement to others--not to glorify yourself, but to glorify God.
What do you see as the relationship between a wedding and marriage?
The wedding went by so quickly in my experience. A lot of it you won't even remember. I was so anxious to get away and start our life together that we rushed through our reception. We've heard it said that many couples place so much stock in their wedding day that they forget about the life together that comes after. I am glad that wasn't really a struggle that we had, but I also think the spirit of your wedding day can help set the tone for your marriage, or at least it did for us. We wanted our wedding to be as care-free as we could make it--the details don't matter as much in the end, and that is very much how our relationship is. We know where our foundation is and all the little stuff is insignificant compared to that.
Any other thoughts or things you want to say about your wedding?
The body of Christ really stepped up around us to make our wedding possible. The venue, the decorations, the food, and all the help were provided by friends, family and church members!
Photographer: Madeline Lewis
Processional music: Soundtrack from "Little Women" by Thomas Newman
First dance song: "Sparks" by Coldplay
Dress: David's Bridal
Catering: Cakes and desserts made by friends
Venue: Trinity View Farm, Franklin, TN